J, a Year 9 pupil, throws open the classroom door noisily, stamps in ten minutes late to the back of the class, fishes in his bag for a book and throws it with a thud on to the desk before pulling out a chair, crashing it on the ground and sitting down heavily. The rest of the class had been working quietly.Variations on this provocative, aggressive display are not
uncommon. Obviously there are many possible responses and teachers will deal with it in their own way. Much depends on the kind of relationship, if any, already established. There are no magic formulae for all situations, only general guidelines, a way of thinking, and many possibilities. Most responses will probably fall into one of the three categories:

1. aggressive;
2. passive;
3. neutral (home position).

Aggressive response
An aggressive response might be to shout angrily at the pupil to get out and come back in properly.  This might have the desired effect. It might, however, precipitate a heightened conflict.

Meeting aggression with an aggressive response often leads to a greater confrontation which may be time-consuming. Before answering in such a way a teacher would be advised to be very confident of his or her ability to gain the psychological advantage and would preferably be absolutely sure that the pupil would do what he or she was asked. If not, there would need to be procedures in the school which could provide adequate support. When feeling tired, stressed or unconfident it is very easy to respond aggressively to an initial provocation without assessing the nature and possible vehemence of the struggle which might develop.

It is worth remembering that the teacher’s focus in such situations is split, since his or her main aim is to get on with the lesson and manage the rest of the class effectively. A pupil behaving in a disruptive way, however, is possibly more focused since he or she need pursue only one aim which may satisfy several needs. Supposing J, in the scenario above, wanted to provoke the teacher because he was angry from an incident in an earlier lesson. By such provocation he may also be avoiding work, creating a scene, impressing some peers and feeling powerful. Since the pupil is more focused he immediately has a psychological advantage. The teacher may, of course, have other advantages as, for example, the sense of being part of a team and of being supported by a clear discipline policy and sanctions within the school.

Here I would like to make the point that meeting aggression with aggression can lead to greater conflict at times. There is, of course, a wide range of possible responses. Usually in any group there are two people who have dealt with a similar situation in very different ways, and they have both been successful since, ultimately, it comes down to our own sense of conviction. There are, however, many choices, many subtle shades of relating, each with their own outcomes.

An aggressive response may be totally appropriate at times, as long as you are sure that you will ‘win’. It is perfectly possible to be commanding, maybe even angry, and yet remain respectful. Respect is of the essence. It is often useful to hold in view the overall, long-term relationship. What, in the long run, will improve the relationship between you and establish the pupil’s acceptance of your authority? How can you best gain his or hen cooperation and respect? The relationship with the whole class is also to be considered. Although pupils like teachers who can keep order, they do nod like injustice or disrespect shown by a teacher.

Passive response
Responding passively, the teacher might do nothing for fear of provoking trouble and might simply tell the pupil the work to be done. Although this might not invite an immediate escalation of conflict as is possible in the point above, neither would it make clear to the pupil, nor to the rest of the class, the kind of behaviour that is required. Seeking attention and a boundary, the pupil might continue with some other disruptive behaviour, redoubling his efforts in order to elicit a response, or might regularly enter the classroom in the same way. At times, ignoring unwanted behaviour can be effective, but it depends on the relationship already established between the teacher and pupil and the determination of the pupil to be noticed.

Neutral response
Making a neutral response the teacher might, for example, greet the pupil, approach him and explain the work to be done, acknowledging his anger and saying he can talk to him or her about it later. The focus would be the work the pupil needs to be doing, rather than the behaviour he should not be exhibiting. The aim would be to get J involved in the lesson and cooperating as quickly as possible so time would not be wasted.

When J had calmed down sufficiently, perhaps at the end of the lesson, or earlier if appropriate, the teacher would ask him to see him or her for a few moments at a specific time to discuss how they could work better together. It is important that this point is made so the rest of the class, and the pupil himself, know that this kind of behaviour has a clear consequence: seeing the teacher. The content of this discussion is best kept private, if possible, partly to save time during the lesson and partly to help the pupil save face.

At this brief meeting the teacher would say that he or she found the pupil’s entrance unacceptable and would ask him to come to class on time and quietly in future. Sanctions if the pupil were to behave in a similar way again would be made clear. The teacher might also mention that the pupil seemed angry and that if he was angry with him or her then they could sort it out. Perhaps the teacher had unwittingly done something the pupil resented during a previous lesson? The pupil, after all, has the right to be angry, but not the right to disrupt lessons.

This third approach disarms the pupil by redefining the situation, refusing his script and assigning him the role you, the teacher, have chosen. The teacher would be focusing on his or her main aim, teaching the whole class, and would not be waylaid by the red herring of disruptive behaviour. The possible anger behind the pupil’s aggressive stance would be acknowledged and the pupil offered a chance to air his or her grievances in private, the teacher again reaffirming the code of class behaviour at this time. The rest of the class would be aware that the behaviour was being tackled, but it would not take time from the lesson.

In a sense, the teacher is addressing those aspects of the pupil which remain calm and which can sit down quietly and take part in a lesson, confident that the pupil is capable of that. This can set a boundary and help the pupil feel safe. The more opportunity a pupil displaying disruptive behaviour has to save face, the more likely he or she will be to accept a way out Any further unwanted comments or behaviour can be met and passed over with the phrase that the lesson is not the place and that the question of how they can work better together can be dealt with properly later.

The pupil has gained the possibility of special time with the teacher and has been treated with respect. It will be pointed out during the meeting that, if the pupil has a grievance in future or wishes to talk with the teacher, the way to do so will be to ask directly for time together, not to misbehave in class. Having given the pupil an alternative strategy for seeking attention and expressing anger, the teacher will have added to the pupil’s overall communication skills. Rather than being diminished by the experience, the pupil can then grow in self-esteem while being told very firmly that the ‘acting out’ kind of behaviour is totally unacceptable and will be met with inevitable sanctions.

Faced with such neutral behaviour, a would-be aggressor cannot be aggressive in the same way. There is no one to fight, since the teacher will not do so and there is no one to intimidate, since the teacher is not open to intimidation. The situation is safe, since a boundary has been set, and the aggressor’s need for attention has been met with the agreement to meet in private. Potential conflict is defused. Many would-be aggressors will calm down with this approach and the relationship for the future can be built in a positive way.

Teachers have considerable power at their fingertips: the way in which they relate to pupils usually influences the result of an interaction, since most of the time most people respond differently, depending on how they are treated. Since some pupils are used to being treated in certain ways and are entrenched in their behaviour, a new approach can sometimes take a little time to take effect. However, it is nevertheless the case that there is much potential for teachers developing skills that can help manage conflict constructively.